Before and After

After marriage there is a very big change in lifestyle for both the husband and wife.  There is the opportunity for the couple to bring both of their ideas, material items, goals, and beliefs to the table and combine them to make something completely new.  Or there is a possibility that the couple will keep to their own ways and have a lifelong wedge between them.
There are so many ways a married couple can drift apart after they say, "I do."  Having kids is one of the biggest distractions that comes along with marriage.  One important thing to focus is to show appreciation, love, gratitude and trust for your spouse.
Many times once children come into the picture, the wives get more busy with household work and the husbands become more busy with work outside the home.  This can lead to perceptions that are not always correct.  Some of the most common is this: "They don't love me like they used to."  When in reality, that is just an assumption thought up when attention is lacking between spouses.
So wives, love your husbands.  Husbands, love your wives.  Couples, understand one anthers situation and communicate always.

What is your family like?

My family is like a Mac computer, shiny on the outside with a whole lot more happening on the inside.  Computers are a vital and modern appliance in today’s society that makes the world go ‘round. Some are old fashioned, and some are new, but the reasons they are bought and used are all similar.  I relate my family to a computer because we are both old and new, but our functions never change; just improve over time. 

            Like the traditional family my parents are the leaders of the household.  In the computer, the main parts are the hardware and software.  These allow the computer to function and work properly, and without either, the computer’s ability to complete tasks would be greatly hindered.  These missing parts could cause the rest of the computer’s parts to not act or work, as they should, thus leading to a faulty and incomplete computer. 

            Luckily my family is whole and functions very well during times of stress and happiness; making us a very happy and blessed.  Each one of us may contribute to making one machine, but we each have our own separate parts that contribute to the whole.  Like stated earlier, the machine wouldn’t work if any of the parts were missing.  So to start, I’ll talk about my mom and dad.

            My mom is the go to lady, the parent my siblings and I go to first just because it had always been that way.  She is like the software on a computer or the operating system.  The main part for getting things going and continuing, the background of the family.  There needs to be a piece that helps and allows other parts to function.  My mom is the rock of our family, but helps my siblings and I to rise up to our potential and take part in our family system.  This is similar in the way a computer works as well.  Over time she has learned things; from being a wife to being a mother, and has changed the ways she has dealt with things.  Computers are the same way in that over time they are upgraded and made better so that they can be used for a wider variety of things.

            My Dad is similar to the hardware on a computer.  He is someone we can store things on and pull things off of.  If we need someone to trust, to ask questions to, or need advice we can go to him for the important things.  Hardware is often taken for granted and not missed until it is gone.  With my dad it is the same way.  We go to him with really important things and when he is gone working and we need him, it is very noticeable.  He is also like the memory chip of our family.  Anything we have planned, things we did in the past, and funny memories, my dad can remember.  But like any memory chip, over time they get full and sometimes don’t work the same.  We tease my dad about that all the time.  The last component is the DVD drive.  The DVD is an outside influence that is put into the computer.  My dad is really good about taking other peoples thoughts and ideas and internalizing them to make himself better.  That is one of the things that I so admire about my dad. 

Now moving on to my 16 year old spunky, my way or no way sister right under me.  She is like the Safari or Internet server on a computer.  The Internet is something that is not always on, nor something you can always access.   If my sister is having a bad day, she is hard to reach and communicate with.  At times she can also be sporadic and not 100 percent reliable.  There are also other times when she wants to get several things done in one day but just can’t do it.  This relates to the Internet that wants to be fast and furious but is sometimes hindered by having too much on its plate.  As you search the Internet you often get more than you want.  You type in a word for Google and it comes up with hundreds of websites.  My sister is very similar to this.  When you are talking to her about something she could pull up any response and just run with it.  It is humorous most of the time but complicated other times. 

            My next sibling is the peacemaker of our home.  She hates conflict and when she is the cause of a fight she is always first to deflate and apologize.  It reminds me of the fan that turns on when the computer starts getting too heated.  But it is never when the computer starts getting warm it is always after it is hot.  It is good for families to get some of their feelings out, but before it goes too far she stops it; same with the computer.  Depending on how warm the computer is determines how hard the fan works as well.  Also the duration of heat determines how long the fan is on.  My sister works this way as well. 

            My youngest sibling is our little man, we finally got the boy!  But being youngest has its advantages and disadvantages.  Sometimes he is pushed to the side because he is young or he is listened to because he is the youngest and is doted on.  When his buttons are pushed he reacts in one of two completely different ways.  Much like the brightness keys on the screen.  After being pushed in the same direction, the screen will either go dark or light.  Lighter is usually preferred, and when its dark you can’t do anything.  With my brother; you want him to be happy at all times, he sets the mood for the family.  When happy, everyone else is happy.  When he is in a bad mood it rubs off on everyone and nothing goes well. 

            As the family grows and works towards becoming better, each individual grows.  After pondering over how a computer works, I see my family in a new way.  Each of us is a vital part towards how our family is made up and works.  If any of us were missing, things would be different in our home.  I understand the importance of individual parts and the detrimental impact that a broken piece can have on the whole unit.  I want to share this with my family and others so that they see the importance that a solid family unit can shape a happy life and future.

Couples, Marriage and More.

It is interesting how men and women are so different but are needed so very much for a complete, whole and unified family.  Although men and women are different, one does not feel any less emotion or love than the other one.  That is why having a man and a woman in the home is so important; a man will play a different role than his wife, and the wife brings traits to the family her husband does not.  
Those families who have two mothers or two fathers are most likely wanting to raise their kids right, and in fact are great people.  But there is no way for them to progress towards eternal happiness the same way a man and a woman can.  Gender roles both bring something different to the relationship and to the family.  There would be things missing if you took one parent out.  God loves all of his children equally and does not judge, and neither should we.  But we as a faith shouldn't feel ashamed or embaressed to stand up for the traditional family and encourage others to seek the same thing.  Because in the end, that is truly what makes you happy.

Family and Child: A relationship

Family life is so important in today's society and can make a huge difference in a child's life as they grow into an adult.  Parents are the main source of knowledge and the biggest examples in their kids life.  It is of the upmost importance that parents take note of their actions and realize it can make a large impact on the lives their children will eventually lead.  My class completed an exercise in which we had to write down 10 things we would strive to do as parents, or when we become parents, that will lead to a happier family life.  The ones I chose are:

1. Be positive

2. Say please and Thank you

3. Respect and help others

4. Speak the truth

5. No violence

6. Share

7. Be grateful

8. Keep promises

9. Smile
10. Say, "I love you"